OT: Lidt sjov inden sengetid

Go to Las Vegas
There"s a guy who lives in Ohio. One morning, he hears a voice in his head. The voice says,
"Quit your job, sell your house, take all your money, and go to Las Vegas."
He ignores the voice.
Later in the day, he hears the voice again.
"Quit your job, sell your house, take all your money, and go to Las Vegas."
Again, he ignores the voice.
Soon he hears the voice every minute of the day.
"Quit your job, sell your house, take all your money, and go to Las Vegas."
He can"t take it anymore. He believes the voice.
He quits his job, sells his house, takes all his money, and flies to Las Vegas.
As soon as he steps off the plane, the voice says, "Go to the Horseshoe."
He goes to The Horseshoe.
The voice says, "Put all your money into a World Series of Poker (WSOP) entry."
He puts up his $10,000 and buys an entry into the WSOP.
He goes to his assigned tournament table.
The first hand is dealt and the guy is dealt AsAd.
The voice says, "Go all in."
He pushes his entire $10,000 bankroll into the pot.
Three players call.
The dealer lays down the flop which is 8h9h10h.

The voice says, "Fuck."


Obnoxious Kid on poker night
This guy is having a lovely poker game at home until his obnoxious 12-year-old son started disrupting things by going around, telling player"s cards, making noise, and being a general nuisance. The father is about to discipline him when an uncle of the family says, "Let me handle this."
The uncle takes the boy in another room and much to everyone"s surprise, they don"t see him the rest of the night. The father says to the uncle, "I really appreciate what you did, what did you say to him?"
The uncle says, "I really didn"t say anything, I just showed him how to masturbate."


Habitually Greener
A rabbit one day managed to break free from the laboratory where he had been born and brought up. As he scurried away from the fencing of the compound, he felt grass under his little feet and saw the dawn breaking for the first time in his life.
"Wow, this is great," he thought. It wasn"t long before he came to a hedge and after squeezing under it he saw a wonderful sight - lots of other bunny rabbits, all free and nibbling at the lush grass.

"Hey," he called. "I"m a rabbit from the laboratory and I"ve just escaped. Are you wild rabbits?"

"Yes. Come and join us," they cried.
Our friend hopped over to them and started eating the grass. It tasted so good.
"What else do you wild rabbits do?" he asked.

"Well," one of them said. "You see that field there? It"s got carrots growing in it. We dig them up and eat them."
This, he couldn"t resist and he spent the next hour eating the most succulent carrots. They were wonderful.
Later, he asked them again, "What else do you do?"

"Well," another one said, "We play Hold"em poker. It"s a great game. Do you want to play?".
This, he had to try. After being taught the fundamentals, the rabbits started to play. Although a fish, the rabbit was very lucky and won several big pots. The last one he drew out on an ace high flush by hitting his card on the river to make his pocket deuces into a full house.
Delighted with his wins, he asked them again, "What else do you do?"

"You see that field there? It"s got lettuce growing in it. We eat that as well." The lettuce tasted just as good and he returned a while later completely full.

"It"s fantastic out here in the world" he told them.

"So are you going to live with us then?" one of them asked.

"I"m sorry, I had a great time but I can"t."
The wild rabbits all stared at him, a bit surprised.

Haha fandme god humor herinde

ja de var kanon gode, lad os håbe at der kommer flere af den slags